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50 Things Your Child Should Never Know

With more information at fingertips than time to read it all, both children and adults are exposed to tons of opinions, facts, and more than any generation in history. To avoid the overwhelming nature of it all, parents can protect their children by not exposing them to dangerous subjects or not teaching them about it all together. Below are the to 50 things your child should never know for their health, the health of the family, politics, education, health, and more.

Things Your Child Should Never Know for the Safety of the Child

Teach your children how to be safe for themselves first. 

1. What 911 is for. Be sure to teach them about the massive gap between crank calls and real life emergencies. Let them know it is okay to dial 911 if they are unsure of what to do in a situation and can’t immediately turn to their parents. Visit 911 for Kids for tips, games, and more.

2. Strangers hide in shadows. Be sure that your children know that a stranger is anyone that hasn’t been introduced to them by a trusted family member or friend. They can also come in all sizes, shapes, genders, and ages.

3. But what if it’s someone who needs help? A common way strangers attempt to interact with children is by pretending they need help. Remind them that an adult who actually needs directions or help finding something is not going to ask a child.

4. You can’t be rude. Actually, to strangers you can. Let your kids know that “I don’t know” and “I can’t help you” are perfectly acceptable answers to strangers. If the stranger asks again, that is the child’s cue to find a parent immediately.

5. It’s okay to go with a stranger if they have kids. Again, this is untrue. If a child gets lost in a mall or some other crowded area, tell them to stay there until a parent or uniformed police officer comes by. If a stranger with kids offers to take them somewhere safe, have the child tell them to bring the help where they are.

6. Take accidents as they come. Always plan with your child what to do or what is going to be done in an accidental situation. If an accident happens away from where the child is, let them know who it is and isn’t okay to get into a car with.

7. Fire safety = stop, drop, & roll. Although it is a good point, there is so much more to fire safety. Teach children how fires start, where to go, and what to do about it. Visit Be Fire Smart for many useful resources on kids and fire safety.

8. You can pet a strange dog if the tail is wagging. Tail wagging in a dog can actually mean an array of emotions including aggression, submissiveness, confusion, or happiness. Be sure that your child knows that it is only okay for them to pet a strange animal when parents are present. 

Things Your Child Should Never Know for the Safety of the Family

Just because they can access it, doesn’t mean they know what to do with it. Keep your children from inadvertently putting your family in danger by concealing these items: 

9. Your social security number. With no need to know this in the first place, a child with a parent’s social security number can do a lot of damage. Refrain from telling them unless there is a very good reason.

10. Your pin number. Even if you graced your child by using their birthday or date that is special to them, there is no reason to tell them your pin number. Anyone who happens to hear your child discussing this can use that information to clean out your bank accounts.

11. Hiding places of valuables. Don’t show them where you hide your valuables or even tell them that there is a hiding place, as they will look. If the child happens upon it, then it’s a good time to find a new hiding place.

12. How much the family is worth. Children who announce their families worth in a dollar amount can make an attractive target to predators. If the child asks, provide vague answers such as “we’re doing okay” or “can’t complain.”

13. Vacation schedule. While it is true that the child is going on vacation with the family, it is important that the child not share that information with strangers. Let them know it is okay to tell teachers, trusted friends, etc. but not everyone needs to know.

14. Where the “adult” items are. Parents who entertain adult reading material, films, or items can expose their child to much confusion. A good idea is to keep it in a locked box and keep the key with you at all times.

15. How to access protected files. Most internet users carry at least some sensitive information on their hard drive such as bank statements or credit card bills. Be sure to keep these locked away and password protected so the child cannot view them. 

Things Your Child Should Never Know for Mental Health

Avoid following the below when discussing illness, health problems, or family crisis with a child. 

16. Keep divorce to yourself. While the details of a separation are not important, a child will sense friction between adults in the house and will worry needlessly if kept out of the loop. Stop by the Dr. Phil site for loads of help on getting a child or children through a divorce.

17. An absentee parent’s past isn’t important. While a child may be separated from a biological parent due to unavoidable circumstances, kids still need to know where they come from. A good rule is to be honest with your children within the limits of their age-levels and understanding. Visit Psychcentral for an expert answer to a related question.

18. Keep illness from children. If a parent or family member contracts a long term illness, the child will find out sooner or later. It is best to share this information in an age appropriate way that doesn’t panic the child. The American Cancer Society has an excellent resource for explaining cancer to kids but is useful for many diseases.

19. Shield children who are ill. Children who contract long term illness are just as subject to the emotional distress that adults are. Learn to recognize warning signs and how to avoid them. Stop by The American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry for more.

20. If you don’t have time for your kids, give them gifts. This sort of guilt driven parenting actually does more harm than good. Children learn that monetary things equal happiness, they get things just by asking, and other harmful lessons. Visit here for more.

21. Tantrums should be ignored. Although kids often throw tantrums to get attention, denying them isn’t the best way. Tantrums should be dealt with coolly and receive neither positive nor negative attention. Check out Kids Health for loads of help on avoiding and dealing with tantrums.

22. Santa Claus? He ranges from good old fashioned kid fun to fairytale. Whether or not you choose to have Santa visit your home, make sure both parents or caregivers are on board with a plan. Sending mixed messages can confuse a child and ruin any fun they might have. 

Political Things Your Child Should Never Know

Although passions in adults run high, complex political issues can be overwhelming to a child and should be discussed in context by avoiding the below. 

23. Voting begins at 18. Legally true, but even grade school children take an interest in elections, especially if it is all over the news. Tell them how and why to vote early on. Parents can even spark lively debates between families on who to vote for. Click this site for even more information on educating children in voting.

24. Why you hate BLANK politician. While criticizing elected officials is not a bad thing, using strong words such as “hate” can give your child the wrong idea. If you have a problem with a politician’s policies, discuss with the child on a level they can understand. It is also another good opportunity to explain how the voting process works.

25. BLANK issue is ruining the country. This sort of devastating language can have a huge impact on the child and their happiness. If a certain issue is bothering you, explain it to the child in context and without using devastating language. Also be sure to talk about a solution and how the child can help.

26. It’s okay to fight in front of kids as long as you make up in front of them. Once the damage of seeing parents or caregivers fight is done, there is little they can do to erase it from a child’s memory. The best way to fix it is to never do it, and this guide has nine ways to avoid fighting in front of kids.

27. ADHD is over diagnosed. If your child tells you he or she has it or is exhibiting signs, a doctor should be immediately seen. A parent who feels they are getting a false diagnosis can ask questions on the tests or even ask for a specific test to confirm. A site such as the ADL also has a very useful guide containing the stories of the children who survived the holocaust.

Educational Things Your Child Should Never Know

Because education doesn’t just begin and end with school, parents can take an active role in shaping their children by discussing the following. 

28. The Holocaust. Waiting until an appropriate age is always a good idea when discussing this tragedy. A good idea is to check with your school to see when they are teaching it, so you can help your child through it. The ADL also has a very useful guide containing the stories of the children who survived the holocaust.

29. Sex ed. Chances are they will come across it in school, but parents are still the best place to learn. Find out when and what your school is teaching to your child regarding sex so you can be ready. You can also consult with your family or church on ways to discuss. If you need a starting point, Advocates for Youth has help for getting started, keeping the conversation going, and more.

30. Just say no. A good starting point, but children need to know why to say no. Explain to them carefully and in context how drugs ruin lives and the best way to defend against it is to never start. The best thing parents can do in this situation is set the example.

31. Alcohol is okay. Children see parents, movie characters, and others drink alcohol, so why shouldn’t they? Talking to them about why and how much adults drink, if it all, is essential for children. Talking With Kids even provides a useful online guide that can be found here.

32. Sometimes violence is okay. Although an adult may know when and when not to use violence, it is a heavy burden to place on a child. Yet even the most cautious parent has a child that is exposed to violent imagery at sometime in their life. Stop here to download a booklet on how to speak with your kids about and even get booklets for other issues.

33. The family finances. All families go through their highs and lows financially. If a parent lost his or her job, reassure the child that everything will be okay and even suggest things such as turning off lights and clipping coupons that the child can help with. If the family suddenly comes into money, set an example by spending, saving, and investing it responsibly.

34. The nightly news. Full of horrific and graphic images, the news is generally not a family friendly program. However, much discussed news items have a way of finding your child’s ears. Create an open environment where your children feel safe in asking about something they saw that is troubling them. A helpful guide for discussing the murder of Sandra Cantu can be found here.

35. Homosexuality. Whatever your views are, children will be exposed to it at some point in their life and may not understand what they hear. Make sure they get information on homosexuality from you the parent before anyone else so that your values and beliefs are not infringed upon. Dr. Nancy Brown wrote an excellent article on explaining homosexuality to kids under the age of 11, and it can be found here. 

Internet Things Your Child Should Never Know 

36. Strangers online are okay. Remind them that a stranger on the internet should be treated like a stranger in real life. If ignoring them doesn’t work, they should tell a parent. Check out NetSmartz for more.

37. Posting a picture is okay in certain situations. Even an innocent looking picture, once it is out there, can be changed to do all sorts of damage. Encourage your child to post a picture of themselves as a favorite cartoon character as a safe and fun option.

38. It’s okay to chat with other children online. Because anyone can pose as anyone else on the internet, chatting and other activities still fall under the no stranger rules. If you’re child does chat, make sure you know who they are chatting to both online and in person.

39. What type of monitoring software you use. If they can Google it, chances are a savvy child will be able to find out how to disable it. Keep software boxes and receipts out of sight so the child cannot find out that way, either.

40. If they are being monitored. Children who know they are being monitored may wait until they have access to another computer to do the stuff they know they shouldn’t be doing. If you catch your child doing something you don’t approve of, talk with them instead of blowing up at them.

41. Your passwords. Because adults often use the same passwords for different sites, telling your child even one password can open the door to them accessing every online account you have. If you have a family account on a site such as Flickr, have the whole family come up with a password together. 

Firearm Practices Your Child Should Never Know

Parents who keep a weapon in their home should carefully read the below for safety tips on how to avoid firearm accidents. 

42. Let the screen teach them. Whether your family owns a gun or not, children should be informed that handling of firearms in television shows and movies is almost always incorrect and should never be modeled with an actual firearm.

43. It’s okay to point a gun at someone if your finger isn’t on the trigger. In actuality the first rule of gun safety is: Never EVER point a gun at something you don’t intend to shoot. It is taught to both adults and children alike. Remind them that pointing a gun at someone is like placing a bet on that person’s life.

44. Don’t touch. Since a gun cannot go off in a resting position, tell your children over and over again that a gun must not be touched unless in the presence of a trusted adult. Even parents without guns in their house would do well to teach children this as they may come across one outside the home.

45. But it’s not loaded. Many guns can still have a round in them even if the magazine is removed. Be sure to tell your children to treat all guns as if they are loaded.

46. What if I find one? Whether at a friend’s house, wooded area, or anywhere else, if your child find’s a gun, tell them the three proper steps to take and make sure they repeat them: 1. Don’t touch 2. Leave 3. Tell a responsible adult as soon as possible. This is especially useful for an abandoned firearm that may be a crucial piece of evidence.

47. It’s just a toy. Don’t be so sure. In fact, some criminals paint their guns to look like toys hoping to fool law authorities. Unless a parent or someone they trust has confirmed it is a toy, the item should be treated just like a loaded weapon. ABC even did a story about it.

48. Take them to a class. Many organizations and shooting ranges have classes on gun safety and may even welcome children. Eddie Eagle is also a popular choice and the site tells you more about where they are, what they teach, and they even have information for parents.

49. Remind them that accidents do happen. One of the most famous accidental shooting deaths was of Brandon Lee, the son of Bruce Lee. You can find the entire story from The New York Times.

50. If you still want to educate your child on the use and safety of firearms, get them a membership into a reputable club, such as the N.R.A. They offer junior memberships that are as little as $25 a year. 

While these 50 things your child should never know is a useful guide, be sure to consult with a physician, licensed mental health professional, or other safety expert when dealing with the health and well being of your child.